I Have Cancer? Whaaat?

Biopsy? Or bad date with vampire??


Interesting timeline of events:
1. Go to ENT because my septum is messed up. ENT pokes at my neck and makes me go get an ultrasound for my thyroid

2. Ultrasound results in ‘go get a biopsy’

3. Bilateral biopsy occurs. It’s really cool to watch the ultrasound monitor and see needles shoved into my neck repeatedly. Seriously! Well, cool until the anesthesia wore off. Owwww Yoga hurt that week!

4. I get a call last Monday from my ENT. I apparently have “Papillary Thyroid Cancer”. Huh? Whut? I have cancer? Whut?

So I do a bunch of research; it’s the “good one to get”. /rolls eyes
But really – I’ll be fine. They will remove my entire thyroid and I just go on replacement meds. No chemo, most likely no radiation. I barely have to miss more than a week or two of work.

I go to an oncologist for a second opinion. Yup, thyroid has to go. I’m Stage 2 (out of 4, so I’m fine). Tumor (TUMOR!?) is 2.4cm. I just thought my neck was lumpy. Now I keep poking my /tumor/ . It’s kinda cool.

This week I meet with a surgeon that specializes in the thyroid removals (apparently a bad removal can mean damaged vocal cords… so I can sound like a woman that has smoked for fifty years… ooo and become a famous blues singer!) and an endoncrinologist.

Honestly, the hardest part was telling my family. Just saying the word ‘cancer’ really freaks people out. There goes my dating life for the next few months. I want a rebrand of the name, since it’s a cancer with like, a 99% success rate. “Oh I have a minor issue called PTC… It’s all good.”

I’m more worried about life without a thyroid. It’s kind of an important gland. 😛 But it’ll be OK. Just gotta keep riding, walking, being active. Unlike this weekend, where I grubbed around the apartment in pajamas with my Kindle.

The wise ass part of me wants to tell my niece and nephew I got cancer from eating McDonald’s. The thought cracks me up. I have a bad feeling this is just the beginning of a long litany of cancer jokes. Cuz.. you know.. now I HAVE cancer, I can make fun of it, right? hahahahah!!!

Know anyone who has had their thyroid removed? I wish the scar was cooler. “A guy tried to slit my throat; all I got was this scar, all he got was A GRAVE!”

20 thoughts on “I Have Cancer? Whaaat?

  1. Sheesh Sarah, I just replied to your other thread and now I see this? I have nothing to complain about! Recover from this kid and at least use the cancer to get sympathy from everyone around you. 😉

    • No way, the cost to fix your bike is right up there with the cost to fix my cancer. I’d be annoyed at either situation and probably complain more about the bike stuff if I had both happen to me. I was cleaning my bike last night and every little scratch on the paint just irked me so much!!!
      What kind of bike do you have on loan right now?

      • That’s a very interesting perspective Sarah. I can buy you a new bike (new bikes are always better right? Think shiny!), but I can’t buy a new you. I’m glad you’re keeping a positive spin on things though, it’s a good sign and shows you’ve got many years ahead of you. 😉
        Scratches and nick are earned, be proud, I would rather see a nicked, scratched but well loved bike than garage queen minter. My bike is 5 years old and has about 30k miles on it. Some parts don’t shine so well anymore but that’s ok.
        My awesome friend at Cynergy hooked me up with a full Ultegra Specialized Tarmac SL3. I have the 1st generation Dura-Ace 10 speed and have to say the Ultegra (2nd generation 10 speed) has sharper shifts than my components. Di2 Electronic for sure on my next ride!

        • I guess the reason I would complain more about the bike is because it was something within my control (e.g. it’s my fault the bike got scratched). I can’t bitch about having cancer because it was not within my control, and therefore can only really be just dealt with.

          HAH it sounds like my parents every time i totaled a car (I’m a lousy driver, much better cyclist). We can always get a new car, we can’t get a new you!

          DOOD The Tarmac SL3? SWEET. I’m not a huge fan of Specialized but that is a HOTTT ride. *jealous*

          • Your parents are right. I do like your perspective about the cancer though. You got moxie kid!

            My current bike is a Specialized Tarmac, it’s served me well. The SL3 is pretty amazing. Much stiffer and faster than my bike. I rode the damn thing from Toluca Lake>downtown>Griffith Park>Sepulveda>Muholland (got rained on there)>Griffith Park>downtown>Toluca Lake yesterday. The bike is fast!!!! I plan on replacing my Tarmac with the Venge soon. I guess I do like Specialized. I have been thinking about the Pinny Dogma though…

            You gotta come out and ride with me one morning. I’ve been going up Angeles Crest before work and it’s great to watch the sun come up

  2. Sarah! I’m thinking of you and praying for you, but I know you’re one tough chick, so I KNOW you will be fine! Stay strong and keep taking care of yourself. Message me and let’s try to get together somtime. It’s not the easiest with the baby, but I can always haul him in a car seat. 🙂 Take care and keep us posted on your progress.

  3. Thinking of you, Sarah. As Martina says, you’re a “tough chick” or, in vernacular of my home country, a gallus burd. But remember your immediate support network – friends and family – and the more ethereal friends who are regularly entertained by your words. And lean on them all when you need to.

    My own Thyroid doesn’t work so well… you’ll do fine with the medication.

    Huggs xx

    • I googled gallus burd and couldn’t find any info. I’ll assume it means tough chick in your international slang. HEE

      THyroid issues run heavily in my family (it’s predominantly a chick thing) so I know what a pesty thyroid is like. Sorry you have to deal with that but hopefully your syntharoid stuff helps?

  4. I’m glad that they caught this early and you’ll fix right up! But it does epically suck that you have to deal with it at all.

    You’ll fight your way through this one. And you’re already working on this part – LAUGH your way through it.

    Much love to you!

    • I wish. I don’t think anyone really wants to have sex with me because of my cancer. Maybe because of my large boobs. But I just feel so.. unsexy.. because .. I have cancer. It’s not really hot. 🙁

      • Come on! You obviously haven’t lived in California long enough. Just picture it… A picturesque walk along the beach after a nice meal… A hollywood tear rolls down your cheek as you gaze into the sunset, and you confess the desire to “know a man’s touch just one last time before you go in for surgery”. Better wear some ear-plugs, because the emotional music is gonna crescendo hardcore as he sweeps you into his arms!

        Ok, too much tv lately or something. Or perhaps caffeine.

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