Went to the endocronologist today to get more blood stolen, to see:
a. if cancer is comin’ back (I’m thinking this is a big NO, fortunately)
b. see if my thyroid levels are within acceptable parameters (I think they are but just marginally)
The problem is, I made way too many life choices right after my surgery. So now I can’t figure out what is the cause of what.
I’m not a person who believes in regret – I MADE the CHOICE. I have to live with it. But it doesn’t mean I like it, yanno?
Also, related to poor life-choices, I’ve gained a considerable amount of weight (15lbs) in the past year or two. It’s so weird being 165 lbs. It’s horrible, I feel HUGE. Because I’m so tall (5’9″), most people don’t really notice, or don’t think I’m overweight. Of course, if you believe in the BMI scale (which is OK for reference, but not to be that relied on), my BMI is 24.4, and ‘overweight’ is 25. That is wayyy too close to comfort.
The doctor was like ‘oh you have lost weight!’, trying to give me a positive, but the truth is, it was cold last time I was at his office so I was wearing more clothes. Today it was just leggings and a light dress. So no, I haven’t lost weight (except muscle mass); I just didn’t wear heavier clothing.
I haven’t been on a bike in weeks; I’m going to make a huge effort tomorrow to at least take the trail bike out for a like, 3mile spin around the canyon.
The choices are mine; I need to make the RIGHT choice. I’ll admit – it’s tough, scary and downright painful making the ‘right’ choice right now. I’m scared just thinking about it. Boo hiss mew to being such a scaredy cat. Which, of course, is yet another choice, right?
Well, to end this fairly boring post – at least I have the ability to make choices. If I have to be a woman, at least I’m a woman in the 21st century in the United States.